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scgiwrap: Caller must be the nobody user |
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Lansing
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Franchise Player: [none]
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Charlotte Trophy Case
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| Pete Rose Award (College Bowl Pool winner) | Choker Award (blew it down the stretch) | Cold Turkey Award (most consecutive losses) |
Charlotte Road Rage 2002 Season Recap (3-12 TP W)
2002 marked an end of an era. Jerry Springer, the last coach from opening day of the first season, was fired after a 1-5 start. Despite taking Charlotte to the playoffs every year and generating a large fan base, Springer was expendable thanks to his dubious 1-4 playoff record. Tonya Harding replaced Springer and picked up right where he left off, finishing 1-7. Charlotte set the record for least number of regular season wins, 2; and most consecutive losses, 9. Then Tonya took a club to every Road Rage fan's hopes for an extra first round pick by winning their TB playoff game.
TB Playoffs: Road Rage 61, Suicides 39
The coaching career of Charlotte coach Tonya Harding is over, as she was fired after the game. Tonya actually had a worse record than the 1-5 start which got Jerry Springer fired. Charlotte crowds had taken to taunting her with chants of "Jer-ry! Jer-ry!" the past few weeks during games.
Meanwhile, the season continues on into the Toilet Bowl for the Suicides, who only want to put an end their misery once and for all.
Week 14: Powerpuff Girls 69, Road Rage 46
Keyshawn had to get a divorce from his wife because she would not stop nagging him about his lack of TD production the past few years.
Week 13: Circus Honkeys 61, Road Rage 43
A referee was killed when he accidentally stuck his head inside a microwave oven instead of the instant replay display monitor.
Week 12: Ozzies 58, Road Rage 35
Charlotte coach Tonya Harding can't figure out why free agent pickup Moe Williams didn't have more success this week. "I studied him on film all week. He was just brilliant when he was with Larry and Curly," she said.
Week 11: Road Rage 56, Muckrackers 37
Randy Moss defended himself this week against criticism that he's soft. "Hey baby, I can take a hit. Matter of fact, each day when I get home, I take three or four deep ones, grab some Krispy Kremes, and I'm pretty much set for the evening."
Week 10: Transvestite Terror 100, Road Rage 45
Tonya Harding tried hard to come up with a team motto to spark up some spirit amongst the Road Rage. Finally, the Rage agreed to go with, "We're never going to Disney World!!!"
Week 9: Princesses 52, Road Rage 49
Both Road Rage and Princesses fans started wearing paper bags on their heads at games weeks ago. After this loss, Charlotte fans are thinking of switching to burkas.
Week 7: Interns 59, Road Rage 41
Tonya Harding's plan to cap all the Washington players in the knee with a lead pipe didn't work. Interns coach Monica Lewinsky has her team wearing knee pads 24/7.
Week 6: Interrogatives 60, Road Rage 20
The Road Rage's season is falling apart faster than Bud Bundy's career did after "Married with Children" got canceled.
Week 5: Ozzies 49, Road Rage 41
On today's Jerry Springer Show, Jerry gave an "apology to all mankind" in his Final Thoughts segment.
Week 3: Fudge Packers 58, Road Rage 40
The Fudge Packers' biggest fan club is called "The EndZone Boys"!
Week 2: Swingers 73, Road Rage 45
After this tough loss to their longtime rivals, several Charlotte players were arrested for assault on their own teammates.
Week 1: Road Rage 57, Walleyes 46
Attendance was down in Charlotte this week as fans were focusing their rage on arguing over the burning question: who is the rightful Miss North Carolina? The one who went topless and was forced to resign, or the runner up who was awarded the crown? Jerry Springer said he hopes to get them both on his show to fight it out.
Charlotte Road Rage 2002 Training Camp Report
It is inspirational to see Jerry Springer work over the Charlotte crowd. They love him down in Charlotte and not just because of their four straight playoff appearances. He can connect with the most troubled soul, which coincidentally is just the kind of player he tries to recruit.
Now that Jerry has spent two years with Randy Moss, the team is hoping some of Springer's 'Final Thoughts' speeches are sinking into Randy's thick head. There is some concern about the RB situation - it was easier when Terrell Davis would take all the beatings, and nobody is sure how Bettis and Tiki Barber will handle that abuse.
Charlotte Road Rage 2001 Season Recap (7-8 1R L)
If it weren't for London's great finish this year, Charlotte's 2001 season might have had a claim as the greatest late-season run ever. Many pegged the last playoff spot for San Antonio or Buffalo two-thirds of the way through the season, but Coach Springer channeled their rage into four straight clutch wins, knocking the defending champ Mucks out of the playoffs in the final game. Despite playing their best football of the season, the Road Rage couldn't get past London in the first round of the playoffs. They missed a shot at facing their rival the Swingers for the fourth straight year with the championship on the line.
Charlotte Ragin' Rhoids 2000 Season Recap (10-5 1R L)
The Ragin' Rhoids were a streaky team, scoring as many as 102 points in one game and as low as 17 in another. But Charlotte had mostly good streaks, leading to the top seed in the playoffs after a 10-4 regular season finish. It was Charlotte's third straight trip to the postseason, and Jerry Springer thought finally this would be their year. They would once again face Orlando, their hated rival, who enflamed the rivalry further by changing Charlotte's name to the Ragin' Rhoids. The Mousketeers sent Charlotte home early, giving Orlando a 2-1 edge in their perennial playoff rivalry.
Charlotte Road Rage 1999 Season Recap (10-6 SB L)
Things weren't looking good for the Road Rage in the first half of the
season, but coach Jerry Springer was able to connect with star WR
Isaac
Bruce's "alternative life-style."; Their closer bond resulted in the JCFFL's first-ever Bundy Award, and the team used its power to strike back at their old arch-rival the Tijuana JailBreaks, renaming them the Tijuana Teletubbies.
With a playoff berth secured in Week 5, the team's morale picked up and they
closed out the season with a five game winning streak to finish at 9-5. Charlotte went on to avenge 1998's first round exit by beating the Swingers in the playoffs before losing to Tijuana in the Super Bowl.
Charlotte Road Rage 1998 Season Recap (6-9 1R L)
Down in Charlotte, fans took their team's name to heart. Charlotte police issued on average 34 aggressive driving tickets (AKA road rage) after each home game. As the team lost five straight down the stretch, coach Jerry Springer organized post-game fights with upset fans to increase TV ratings instead of working on game strategies. Despite an undefeated record against the kicked out teams, Charlotte had the worst record against current teams. Charlotte was swept by the Swingers, Princesses and Saints.
